he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
