She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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