Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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