oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
