Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
