Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
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I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
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