In America we eat man semen.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
The adults are the big ones right?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
