Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
