I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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