You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
