That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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