When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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