if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
