I wannas sexs uuuuu
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
