I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize