im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
