Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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