Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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