I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
