WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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