finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize