I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
