I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
