Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
