If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
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Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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