The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
