I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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