operation harelip BJ is a go
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
