How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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