matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Still dying that you shit outside
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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