So drunk, too bad you don't want this
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
