Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
