roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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