I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
that may or may not have been my penis.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
