i think my tv is drunk
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
