I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
