the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
