i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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