well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize