how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
