i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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