I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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