i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
