it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
