Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
