if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
