I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
