Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
