Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
