i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
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