Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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