she looked like the before picture.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
