about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
